I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
