Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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