Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
