we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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