I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
