I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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