And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
