just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
