Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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