why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
