just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize