What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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