...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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