Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
