Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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