I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
