You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I just had sex on a roof
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
