I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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