I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
