is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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