so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Randomize