Betty ford says i'm here all night
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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