Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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