First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
God I need to hump something, right now.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
