He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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