Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
