Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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