I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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