Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
My balls are so social today.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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