He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
