he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
