At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
