no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
