I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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