think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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