idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
