i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
