my shit smells like andre
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
