I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
