Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
