Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Non-Jews are for practice
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
