why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
