They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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