I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
