This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
