Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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