Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
