I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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