i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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