Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
